1. you're the birthday boy or girl.

 hello!

welcome to my later twenties.
now get off my lawn.

 (the christopher robin birthday book, c1931)

i can remember many a birthday when our christmas tree was still up.

we never had a real one so there was really no rush.

plastic is already dry, and rarely turns brown or sheds.

but we would never, ever put my birthday gifts under the tree.

such a thing would be offensive to santa and jesus and our dog jake, who would try to eat them.

today i am surrounded by finer things, like pumpkin butter and hot tea and haircuts and anticipation.

also, good advice from friends:

bring it on, 2-6.